Poltergeist

Director: Steven Spielberg
Cast: Craig T. Nelson, JoBeth Williams, Beatrice Straight,
Year: 1982
Rating: PG-13
EERin's Rating: "Creepy!" - 4 out of 5 Slashes

Most horror fans have seen this film. But anyone who hasn't might underestimate just how creepy it is. There's a softness to the story because it's centered around a family. I assume that some people view this as a scary Disney film. Well, just because "R" didn't make the rating cut, don't feel too safe.

We open to a picturesque, down-to-earth suburb where the Freeling family of five lives. Stephen and Joanne Freeling are a loving couple and caring parents of the teenage Dana, middle child Robbie, and the five-year-old precious Carol Anne. Life is wonderful and perfect - until forces from another world decided to enter their home and turn it, along with their lives, into a living nightmare. Chairs move by themselves, lights go on and off, and all seems harmless at first until Carol Anne is abducted by the unseen intruders and held captive in another dimension inside the house.

This film receives my highest rating, which means I was freaked out! The brilliance in Poltergeist is that it wraps you into a scenario you can relate to. The normal suburban home with the normal mom and dad and their normal children with their normal dog. You feel this could be your home and, for many of us, home is security and comfort (sigh!). Spielberg takes the trust we put in that comfort and stabs us in the back! For example, let's have your house kidnap your sweet, innocent little girl and make you listen to her screams while you can do nothing to help. Home isn't so great anymore.
Spielberg also brings to life some of our childhood fears. We've all had at least one toy in our lives that creeped us out. In Poltergeist, poor little Robbie is scared of a happy-looking toy clown doll. What happens? The doll comes to life and tries to kill him. Very Child's Play, and I haven't even begun to relate the disturbed mess Chucky leaves me in!
Scariest scene: I could pick a few from this film, but the most subtle scene gives my spine shivers. The whole family is gathered around one evening after Carol Anne's abduction. While they can't see her, she can be heard through the TV. They talk to her and listen to her voice as it echoes in the house. Suddenly, Carol Anne's tiny voice says, "Mommy, there's somebody here..."
All I can think at this time is, "What the hell is in there with that child?"
Bottom line: If you want to revisit some childhood memories, here's a creepy way to do it!

Wolf Creek

Director: Greg McLean

Cast: Kestie Morassi, Nathan Phillips, John Jarratt

Year: 2005

Rating: UR

EERin's rating: "Could have been so much more" - 2 out of 5 Slashes

Oy! Such irritation when one wrong move ruins an entire piece of work. It's like a friend saying they're going to bake you a delicious apple pie. Your mouth is watering - the pie looks good, smells good, but you take a bite and something is terribly wrong. Suddenly you realize that instead of sugar your friend accidentally used salt (wa, wa, wa!). That's what happened to Wolf Creek and I felt that this film could have been such a tasty apple pie, but I was disappointed with the marring of salt.

British tourists Liz and Kristy team up with their Aussie pal Ben for a road trip adventure in the Australian outback. They make a stop at Wolf Creek for some hiking, but upon returning to their car the engine fails to start and they're stranded in the desert. As the sky darkens, a rustic-looking truck drives up manned by a Crocodile-Dundee style man named Mick Taylor. He offers to help the trio out by towing their car back to his camp where he can make repairs. Mick's "camp" turns out to be a creepy mining site that's been abandoned for years. The tired trio accept the offer of fresh drinking water from their host as he attempts to fix their car. Suddenly they all pass out and the next thing the audience sees is Liz tied up in a shed with her friends nowhere to be seen. Instead of rescuer, Mick turns into the biggest nightmare as a night of terror in the outback begins to play out.

I really like the idea of taking a stereotypical Dundee-persona Australian and turning him into the bad guy. But I'm afraid this film breaks my cardinal rule in horror - don't make the characters stupid. About half way through the film, there's pivotal scene where Liz comes to Kristy's rescue, who is being terrorized at the hands of Mick. Liz has a gun pointed at Mick (showing she clearly has never handled one before) pulls the trigger, and a bullet bounces off a metal beam and knocks Mick unconscious. It's really unclear if he is dead (but what an advantage for our heroines, yes?). But Liz thinks it's a good idea to just ignore all the handy tools/weapons surrounding her and just hit Mick on his back a couple of times with an empty gun. A perfectly good chance to overtake the bad guy is completely blown.

Now there are a lot of philanthropists who would argue against me saying, "It just goes to show that Liz and Kristy are better people and they don't have the heart to kill another human being." That's all very well and good and of course one could argue that Liz was paralyzed with fear at the moment and couldn't think very clearly. However, I can't help but feel annoyed because there were a number of things Liz could have done make sure that she and Kristy were safe from Mick. If you can't kill him, why not at least tie him up? How about locking him in a shed? The rest of the movie feels forced because these chicks blew their one chance of escape.

Spoiler scene: No need to rehash it - I think you guys can figure it out.

Bottom line: Know those pivotal TV shows where it's revealed that it was all just a dream for the main character? Here's the film version of that.

Aliens

Director: James Cameron

Cast: Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn, Bill Paxton

Year: 1986

Rating: R

EERin's rating: "Effing cool!" - 5 out of 5 Slashes

At 10-years-old, this was my favorite film and I was supposed to be idolizing princesses (Ellen Ripley was my princess!).  True to its plural title, Aliens is filled with ghastly creatures out to kill the protagonists.  Director James Cameron wisely saw an opportunity here for a military theme with good-old-fashioned man vs. aliens. Of course this scenario has been hacked to death over the years, but Cameron was one of the first to think of taking a scary situation and filling it with some kick-ass battles!

After 57-years of hibernation sleep, the last survivor of the first Alien film, Ellen Ripley, awakens in a remote space station. Her account of the events that took place on the Nostromo with the "alien" is met with skepticism and scorn. Until communication is lost with the colonization who have inhabited the site of the alien space craft which provided the first creature Ripley encountered. A team of high-tech Marines are sent in to investigate with Ripley accompanying them as an advisor. Her greatest fears are confirmed when the team enters into an all-out war between the creatures and survival chances become slim.

I miss the old ways of special effects. Before the overuse of CGI, if you wanted an alien - you made an alien. The puppets/animatronics provide a more realistic vibe to these creatures that supposedly don't really exist. They're dark and sleek like creepy eels and best of all they have a Queen who's gigantic and pretty much the creepiest of all! These aliens look like they're ready for war which makes the battle sequences all the more gripping

Now back to my princess. Sigourney Weaver received an Oscar nomination in this role for Best Actress and rightly helped to define the female action hero. It's rare to find a character that embodies smarts, grit, and feminism without coming off as obnoxious or shrewd. Weaver does it with such honesty and grit so as to make her completely believable in an unrealistic setting. The Marines in this film are an arrogant, grungy albeit tough group. They brush off Ripley's dire warnings with sarcasm and she apprehensively puts her safety into their hands. When the ball drops, Ripley takes the reigns of the "rescue" operation for the colonists which has turned into a battle for survival. Who can't love a woman who takes over a man's job?

Best scene: Ripley gets on an elevator to descend alone into the creatures' lair. On the ride down, she gears up with a pulse rifle, flame thrower, grenades and flares. By the time the elevator reaches her floor and she steps out, you can tell she's not one to be f----d with.

Bottom-line: This a great, stylish thriller with a kick-ass heroine...AND I highly recommend watching the director's cut version.